Day #3: The Birth of the Anti-Dania Furniture Revolution (2/18)

This is the fourth installment in the dramatic series of my negative review of shopping at Dania Furniture.

Preceding Posts:

Chapter I. Day #1 Dania Furniture Debacle: Dania Fails to Deliver (2/16) Pt. 1

Chapter II. Day #1 Dania Furniture Debacle: Dania Fails to Deliver (2/16) Pt. 2

Chapter III. Day #2: I'll Show you What $75 Can Do (2/17)

In the morning, sitting at my desk at work, I received a phone call from the sales associate I had been going back and forth with.  He had a good news for me, for a change. I could have my couch resent to me without additional cost.  Wow, it only took three days!  Despite the eternity it took for him to have this approved, I understand that he is ill-equipped with the customer service tools to make him successful in a situation that warrants such attention.  Like mine.  So, kudos to him, but shame on Dania for taking so effing long.  I mean, seriously.

I told him I would need time to consider it, because I was now considering going with a different couch, in which I said I would attribute him with the upsale. Yes, my bitterness had not yet reached its nadir...yet, as I was still considering staying with my terribly overpriced Dania Furniture.

All morning long, I went back and forth on which couch to go with, as it was a huge decision to make.  The old couch was cheaper and more affordable, but the other one was nicer and would likely be more impressive to my friends.  I then considered what potential problems I would have with the couch and was fearful that if I did business with Dania, they would not likely provide sound post-purchase, customer service to me.  I did not research their "customer service" policies, but given the experience I was immersed in...I could only imagine a situation fraught with frustration, confusion, anger, and depression.

At the end of the day, when I totaled up the expenses and potential issues I could have, I reasoned that the furniture, altogether was well overpriced.  I could not accept that much risk.  Not now, in a time of such economic and social uncertainty.  This is a time in my life when I need stability and I couldn't rely on Dania to give me that in my furniture.  Simply put, I would've been a fool to have completed my purchase with them.

I was having lunch at Long Provincial, home of the world's greatest vermicelli bowl, when I put it all together and decided enough was enough.  It was crystal clear that I had to cut all ties with Dania Furniture and be the voice of the millions of screwed Americans that were forced to purchase additional delivery.  Enter, the Anti-Dania Furniture Revolution.

Caught up in the moment, I stood up from my seat, (immediately after placing my pork vermicelli bowl + egg roll order), and called Dania to tell them that it was over.  I was breaking up with them, forever. As soon as the sales associate picked up, I instructed her that I would like to return all of my terrible Dania Furniture, that I did not want to pay for a cent of anything, and that I wanted them to pick up the chair from my apartment.  There's no way I could walk into my living room day in and day out without getting furious at the sight of any Dania Furniture in my home, let alone deal with the nausea and diarrhea that has come of it.

She recorded my request, but expressed uncertainty as to whether or not the Evil Dania Furniture Empire would be willing to fulfill it.  "Not surprising," I told her.  When she asked for my phone number, I told her that I had a new phone number (724) 61-DANIA, and that I wanted to be contacted on that line exclusively.  Unimpressed, she said "I need a real phone number."  I corrected her and informed her that it was indeed an actual phone number that I own and that it would be important to be reached only on that line.

Sensing some sass from her end, I announced to her that I was launching an online phenomenon against Dania Furniture.  I don't know where this came from, but somehow, someway, I found the courage to tell her I would not lose this bitter, furniture war.  I informed her that the trauma I've experienced is the worst pain anyone in the history of mankind has had the misfortune of experiencing.  I would no longer stand idle and allow these grave atrocities take place.  Dania would no longer screw me or have a chance to screw me...ever again.  In fact, if there's any screwing that's going to take place, it's going to be me screwing Dania with the truth.  In a fight of ideals, they are unarmed.  I have the power of my voice and it will not stop screaming anti-Dania rhetoric until they are put out of business.

Sensing some sass from my end, from her perspective, I presumed, she informed me that I would be receiving a call later when someone has had a chance to review this request.  Perhaps her sass was justified, as my reaction could have been perceived as "over-the-top."  I prefer to refer to it as a dramatic interpretation of how I truly felt inside as a victimized consumer.  Maybe she's had the good fortune of never experiencing such strife in life, and didn't have a means of empathizing.  

Within minutes, my vermbowl arrived, and I was in heaven.  The combination of fantastic flavor and pride in telling Dania Furniture off was exhilarating.  I did what many Americans failed to do...stand up for their furniture delivery rights. This, dear readers...this will be my legacy...

Day #1 Dania Furniture Debacle: Dania Fails to Deliver (2/16) Pt. 2

This is a continuation from this post.

The answer is/was NO, Dania Furniture did not have a reasonable solution to this gigantic problem.  In fact, when I called them to explain what had happened and discuss the necessary next steps, I was instantly rebuffed.  Yes, I was perturbed that I did not receive my couch when I thought I would, but as a reasonable man, I figured there should be an easy solution to this.  As per Dania's anti-customer focus, the sales associate immediately blamed me for not measuring every facet of my apartment building to prepare for the furniture.  Interestingly enough, this gentleman on the phone was the one that actually sold me the sofa, and didn't mention a syllable about measuring all the rabbit holes.  In fact, the residents that lived in the unit before I moved in had enormous sectionals half a football field in length, so I just assumed this sofa wouldn't be a problem.  He also told me that if I wanted to have it redelivered or pick out another couch, I have to pay $75 to have it "re-delivered."  (By the by, how can something be "redelivered" when it wasn't delivered in the first place?  You can't "re" anything until you do it at least once.  They brought the couch to the apartment building, but they didn't get it inside my unit.  Perhaps that's the way they define delivery - bringing it to the street address, minus the unit, guaranteed.)  He was unwilling to budge on this with me, because the delivery services are outsourced to Suntrax Logistics.  There was never any sort of apology, explanation or way to reason with him.  He was straightforward, and hurled all the responsibility on me, despite the fact that it was him and his godforesaken store that sold me the the largest couch in the universe and chair.  I basically ended up paying a company to bring an overpriced chair to my apartment for $75, and there was nothing he was willing to try to do for me, at this point.

Reasoning and/or my side of the story was not of his concern/interest; he shut me down immediately, so I said my goodbye and hung up.  With my heart beating outside of my chest and tears almost welling up in my eyes, I felt emotionally decimated.  Not only did I not have the couch I purchased and paid to have delivered to me, I had to eat $75 with in "delivery" expenses and face the idea of picking out another couch and paying for another delivery fee.

It's amazing how a lack of customer service can have a lasting affect on the consumer.  Isn't it wrong to instantly hurl blame onto me, the innocent, doe-eyed customer spending my discretionary income on overpriced metrosexual furniture? Within five minutes of hanging up the phone, I decided to completely nix the idea of giving into their faux-furniture delivery scheme and dialed up the store phone number again.

Within a couple of rings, it was that terrible sales associate who sold me the sofa he blamed me for picking, so I responded to his condescending phone greeting and immediately said, "Can I speak to anyone but you?"  I was then passed off onto another sales associate, who was self-proclaimed "lower on the totem pole" than the guy I was speaking to.  That was fine with me, I just wanted to understand if someone could see my point of view.  I explained to him how the movers were unable to bring the couch into my apartment.  I explained the issue with the couch's feet protruding and blocking the movers from being able to move the couch into the elevator to take to my unit.  I also explained that bringing the furniture up the stairs was also shot down by the movers and that only the chair was delivered.  I explained to him that my $75 covered the shipping of both the couch and chair and that not refunding me part of the delivery fee and/or redelivering the couch or picking out a new one should come at a $0 delivery fee.  After all, how can you charge me a delivery fee when it wasn't delivered?  It does not make any sense.  The delivery failed; I only received one of two items I had paid to have delivered.

Fortunately this gentlemen agreed with me, and I knew right away that I found my angle and opening to rectify this situation, singlehandedly.  Immediately, I asked to speak to the sales associate who picked up the phone/sold me the couch.  I ran him down the checklist of items and got him to agree with me that the fulfillment of my delivery was not satisfied.  He also agreed with me that charging me an additional delivery fee was exorbitant, but stated that store policy barred him from making any exceptions. When I asked him to see if there was a way around this, he instructed me that his store manager was unavailable until the upcoming Saturday (2/19).

What was most frustrating of all was the fact that he was unwilling to work with me on finding a solution that didn't cost me more money. He was unwilling to reach out to anyone above him, as I asked him to reach out to the district manager and/or corporate headquarters for any assistance for this problem. He stonewalled me when I asked him if this is the first time that this has ever happened to anyone, he stated "no, this is not" but that "most people just pay the $75 to have it resent, or pay $75 for another couch to be delivered."  Apparently Dania does not have any issues with adding more cost to an inherently expensive shopping experience.  When I pointed out how terrible of a customer service experience it is, he didn't have anything to respond to me with.

Now, I understand that he was most likely acting in the way that he was trained.  I can't fault him for perpetuating their terrible customer service, because that's how he was taught to react (I even expressed this to him in a later conversation you will soon read about).  This is clearly an issue for corporate to fix, but I still did not appreciate his refusal to provide any sort of solution to this problem.  To his credit, he kept his cool and at the very least did humor me by listening to my hysterical diatribe that included the following statements, as best as my traumatized mind can recall:

• "Don't you know how much this is ruining my life?  I have to pay an additional $75 to have something maybe delivered to me?  I am such a victim."
• "This is ruining my entire day.  I had such high hopes of going home today after work and sitting on my couch, where I would eventually pass out on.  It was going to be awesome, but now I can't do that.  Do you realize how terrible this makes me feel?"
• "Dania is ruining my life.  I hate Dania Furniture."

Most importantly of all, however, by the end of the conversation, I got him to agree with me that this was an unfortunate situation.  I asked him to confirm if my being upset by this is reasonable, and he agreed with me.  By the end of the conversation, whether it was to appease me, or not, he said he would "see what he could do to help me out."  Since I had maxed out my diatribe quota, I told him that I appreciated this gesture and would like to follow-up with him the next day...